| My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Voldemort gets suspended by LJ Abuse for writing underage slash fic after converting to Scientology Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom |
| My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Bellatrix Lestrange goes on a hot date with Narcissa Malfoy by clever use of the Golden Snitch Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom |
| My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Ginny Weasley kills Hedwig the Owl in a very sexy scene Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom |
| My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Voldemort becomes a barista at Starbucks in the library, with the revolver Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom |
| My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Harry becomes a Broadway star with a nuclear weapon Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom |
| My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Jack Bauer blows up Hogwarts in the conservatory, with the lead piping Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom |